#18 Our Story

As there is an absolute lack of exciting information on my day (I tidied my room a bit and now there is floor -that's all there is to tell) I decided I would tell the story of how Chris and I became a couple as I'm sure you're all dying to know.

We first met about half way through the first year of uni.  His best friend, Stone, was trying to restart the Pagan Society and by luck the info was passed to me so that I turned up and met Chris.  Nothing exciting happened.  But he was the one in the group that I selected to be my friend - I have this awful habit of deciding which person in a group I want to be friends with before I know any of them.  So we talked and laughed, etc, but I didn't see him as anything other than a friend.  Besides, I thought Stone was hot (let's not go down that road because the thought now fills me with total ewness - sorry Stone).  But anyway, Chris and I clicked.

We then didn't see each other again, except once or twice, until the last night of uni - the SU bar was open for the final send-off of all students.  It wasn't that great, I had been partying hard that week so by Friday I couldn't drink any alcohol and just felt ill, but I had promised friends that I would be there, so I was (and now, of course, am so glad I went).  Anyway, when I saw Chris and Stone there I naturally spent time with them, and that's when the flirting began. 

Anyone who knows me knows that I relate to other people through either flirting or arguing (usually both), so it was no surprise that I was flirting with Chris - I didn't know how else to relate to him.  By the end of the evening I was wearing his jacket as not feeling that great had given me the cold shivers.  It had nothing to do with the skimpy new dress I was wearing, honest.  BFF asked me a few times that night if I liked Chris to which I adamently said 'no' and I was being entirely truthful.  I saw him as a friend but really wasn't attracted to him (no offence Chris - I am now, if that helps).  Apparantly Stone had been asking Chris the same thing all night but he gave the same answer as me as I understand it.  Turns out our friends know us better than we seem to know ourselves.

At the end of the night I had planned on staying over at BFFs as I did a lot last year.  I don't remember how, but somehow Chris ended up joining us.  We watched a film, me laying on Chris because it was just so comfortable.  We set up the airbed and Chris got under the cover whereas I settled down on the sofa.  Again, I don't know how but it wasn't long before I was also on the airbed trying to get comfy.  Despite being so tired, we stayed up ALL NIGHT talking.  We told each other a lot that night and no I don't remember all of it, but I remember some of it was the kind of stuff you don't tell just anyone (hence I'm not going to write it here.)  As I said, I wasn't attracted to Chris, not physically, but I was attracted to his personality and just the essence of him.  So at about 3am I kissed him.  Apparantly he hadn't been expecting it, but we were happy to keep kissing and talking for the rest of the night.

That kiss was a big deal for me (even if I can only vaguely remember it now).  I have to thank Alex for teaching me not to regret anything - if I hadn't learnt this lesson I would never have kissed Chris as I would have been too worried about what would happen in the future.  So I took a (mental) deep breath and decided that if it wasn't worth it, it wouldn't matter.  As it turns out, it was worth it. 

I never expected the relationship to last as long as it has (1 year next month!) and would never have expected it to have such an impact on me as a person.  It has made me re-evaluate my goals in life (though, in fairness, they haven't really changed much but I thought about them none-the-less).  I am happy with where we are as a couple and I'm looking forward to years of us continuing to grow together become closer and closer with every moment.  A year ago I would have scoffed at the idea that I could love someone this much, that one person would mean so much to me.  But here I am.  Change happens and I'm glad it did and I'm glad I'm learning to accept it.