#7

Once again I find myself not knowing what to write.  I am wondering if I am the same person - I know I have changed but have I changed so much that I am now someone else?  That's how it's beginning to feel.  I'm not unhappy but neither am I completely happy, at least not as much as I was last week when I was hyper and dosed up on love.  The love is still there but as Chris has been spending time at uni and getting his work done we are no longer in the euphoria state. 

And I have found myself becoming lonely.  I don't really get bored as I have plenty to occupy myself - internet, tv, writing (which I haven't been doing nearly enough of), films, crafts (which I haven't done any of since classes finished).  But I'm not having human contact.  I see Chris every day but he feels part of me so it's not the same as hanging out with your friends.  Hopefully BFF will be coming round later and we'll watch lots of Doctor Who and catch up on all the gossip.  I wasn't able to see her yesterday as I can't get into town at the moment.  I know it is no one's fault that I feel so lonely but sometimes it feels as if it's my fault for not making more of an effort (even though I know it is not me but my M.E.).  That's all I have to say for now.  I hope I can pick myself out of this slump soon as it's effecting me and Chris and my work (which is due in next week and still isn't done!).