My housemates have gone out clubbing and I am left alone in the house. It feels strange as I love going out and as it's fresher's week, the place will be busting. On one hand I am missing meeting people, I am missing feeling like I have a life.
But on the other hand I know just walking there would kill me, and that's without heels on (and heels are a must for a good night out). I know the music would pulse through my body and I know I'd get claustrophobic around that many people.
Yes, I am upset that I can't include myself in the socialising, in truth I hate it. But I am trying to remember that if I went I would end up hating it as my body is just not functioning well enough for me to enjoy it. And there's no point wasting energy on something I'm not going to enjoy. I have to pick my battles, and I've chosen to let this one past - there will always be more opportunities to go out, I just have to wait for the time when my health can accept them.
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I always felt miserable in clubs for that very reason. Too many people packed in, grabbing at you. It just was NOT enjoyable to me. I'd rather get together with friends at a quiet restaurant or coffee shop and talk.
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